There are mother and baby forumms everywhere, I could list them but I haven't time, but I've only seen one or two dad's forums.

Since finding YeGads I've told friends who are dads; at our NCT course I took time to talk to the other dads to be there and told them about the site, and the main reaction seems to have been:

"Why would we want to go on a site like that? <insert name of parter> does all that"

So why don't men want to talk about this stuff?

We panic just as much as our partners, and in some cases (not all) we're activly put in the background by the system so you'd think men would be rejoicing at a male orientated forum where they can ask questions and be perhaps a little more honest than they could otherwise.

Any ideas, or am I just ranting?

Agreed, there aren't many other dads forums like this and not enough dads are taking advantage of it..

I think that any dads saying "Why would we want to go on a site like that? <insert name of parter> does all that" are just full of air. They will be just as concerned and curious as the rest of us but feel it would be showing weakness if they act like normal people. We went to an NCT class, which was good and bad, but there was one dad-to-be who was just too cool to be there! He had a quick come-back for everything and nothing was a problem or would bother him. I'm not in touch with him now but would be interested to find out how he coped when the labour started and the baby arrived etc.. I've found the classes and theses forums a great help. nothing really prepares you, but you can be in a much better position if you find out about anything that bothers you.

I do think its true that women tend to lead on a lot of stuff where babies are concerned. But I think that is just as much about 'how women are' as it is 'hom men are'. However, some men tend to use this as an excuse to do sod all and make a joke of everything... each to their own, but I would put money on them regretting it a few years down the line, that is if they are honest enough with themselves to realise they missed out by being too macho.

About time I say. I agree with both of you.
Every bloke I know has been shocked or surprised about something in the lead up to the birth, the birth itself and then afterwards.
I think it is still perceived as not being manly or something.
Personally i think things will change as more and more dads are at home now as full time carers and the credit crunch will only add to their number.

I think it's sad that there are people out there who don't want to be involved. I helped create this life, so I've got a pretty huge responsibility towards them and want to do the best I can.

I guess the one thing you could say is at least those people aren't here ruining it for everyone

daddydave wrote:

QUOTE:
...We went to an NCT class, which was good and bad, but there was one dad-to-be who was just too cool to be there! He had a quick come-back for everything and nothing was a problem or would bother him.

I experienced a similar thing at my NCT course. a couple of the guys only turned up to half of one of the courses, and spent the whole time refusing to take part in the activities. I felt really sorry for their partners.

Well at least we acknowlege we're all wierd, and I apprecieate the support and advice I've had from everyone since comming onto this board.

oh yeah... 8 DAYS TO GO!

Some of those NCT games/activities got me doubting whether the class was for me, but nothing ventured - nothing gained right! I figured if i can't make a fool of myself now, how will I cope when I'm in the middle of M&S with baby poo dribbling down my shirt and no apparant hole in the ground to swallow me up!

Glad the forum is helping, it feels like there are a few of us on here now.

Is it 8 days to go until birth date? 1st Jan?